I was taught to only use 'too' if you could subsitute 'also' for it. Is that wrong?

Thanks Larry.  You're helping out quite a bit. 

Care if I post another and hear what you think?

As always. let me know what you think.

There's a little courtyard under my third floor apartment window where the girls like to sunbathe and most of the men like to watch. I say most because I'm not included in that group.  To be honest, I have never found any interest in that.

        What does looking do for you?  It's just like going to a strip club, something else I despise.  You get a hard-on and that's it.  The little sluts just take your money. The more you give, the more they enjoy your company.  As soon as you cross that line though, they look at you differently.

        You can look, but you can't touch.

      I've heard the guys from the complex talking about the girls. What they would do to them, if the one in the red bikini had real tits.  They make these statements and ask me questions as if I'm part of the their club.

       I'm not.


       I just nod my head and walk away.  Her tits are as real as those guys are.  Like I said, looking never did anything for me. 

      Then she moved in.

      I saw her for the first time three weeks ago in the lobby.  Just passing each other. But that moment she had me. What it was exactly, I couldn't say, but I was going to find out.

      This happened five years ago with the girl from the bank.  That project lasted a year before she failed me.

       I had such hopes for her

      Always smiling.   Being nice.  Looking at me differently from the other customers.

       It all came to an end the one day when I just couldn't hold back any longer.  My senses overpowered me and I had to touch.  I had to feel her. My dreams of her softness, the melting of her flesh into my hands.  My body.  The dreams had to become reality. As she handed me my cash, I grabbed her hand.  It was true.  The warmth engulfing me was amazing.  I felt my pants grow tighter as I held her longer.  Then she pulled away.  She retreated.  I could tell the damage was done by the expression on her face.  As I said, as soon as you cross that line they look at you differently.

        You can look but not touch.   

      I left the bank to end the encounter in my car.  I knew that was it for her. I never went back.

       I never cared before and to be honest, I didn't think I ever would, but Christ she's just beautiful. I just keep staring at her.  Whether it's leaving the building to take out her trash or lying almost naked on a chair on the courtyard.  I'm jealous of the sun for being able to cover every inch of her body.  That should be me.

       I'm one of them.

       No, I'm not and she's not.

        We're different.

       I'm different and she has to be.  She looks it and has to feel it.  The way she lays there.  Her long black hair overflowing the chair’s boundaries. The sweat from her body giving off a glow that makes her stand out even more.  With her legs slightly raised and bent at the knees, I can see the sweat roll down them and fall off the chair.  Forming small pools of her on the ground. To drown in those pools.  I can't see them, but I know they're there. I wonder if she knows that I'm here and if she did would she still lay there.  I've gone down to the courtyard in the early hours of the morning to sit in the same chair as her.  Knowing and feeling my flesh is touching the same spots as hers.  I can only sit there for a few moments before those thoughts overcome me and I have to go to my car.  Once I didn't make it in time, but that doesn't matter.   

      It sickens me that the others watch her too.  There's nothing I can do about that though.

      She lives in apartment 238.  That means she is right below me.  I've dreamt that same thing many times.   That has to be a sign.  It's fate.  All these fucks stare at her don't have the connection we do.  This was meant to be.

      The other day, I was watching outside my window for her to leave.  When she did, I went out to my car and waited. It only took 3 hours and 43 minutes for her to return.  As I saw her pull in, I jumped out of my car and slowly walked to the building.  Slow enough to make sure she was right behind me, but not to slow to draw attention to myself. Her arms were full with bags of groceries, so I held the door open for her.  She smiled and said thanks. She smiled to me! At me!  I inhaled her as she walked by.  I wanted to reach out and touch but I didn't dare. I wanted to feel.  The sensation I had inside at that moment was unexplainable. Unbelievable.  To be so close to her.  To see every open inch of her beautiful skin.  Flawless skin.  I was so filled with excitement I swore that I was going to cum in my pants right there.   

      As we approached the elevator, I wanted to make small talk, to just say something to her, but I didn't dare.  I pushed three on the panel and turned to her.

She said, "Two please." 

The only thing that would have made this moment be absolute heaven would be if she had said three.  Within in a flash the doors opened and we were on the second floor.  I spoke to her then.

      I really did. 

       I asked if she needed help with her bags and by the grace of god she said yes.  I followed her to her door and to be honest I'm not sure if we spoke or not.  I just know when I looked up I saw 238 in cheap black plastic numbers on a door.  She said thanks as I put the bags down.  I just smiled and walked away.  What the hell could I have said? The fact that I've been watching her for weeks, that I've licked the chair that she sunbathed in, to see if I could taste her, the fact that the thought alone gave me pleasure, in both of my heads.  Even I'm not that stupid.  I walked back down the windowless hallway to the elevator.  To my amazement, she was still there.  Not in the flesh, but her smell.  I stood there and inhaled over and over again.  She was finally inside of me.

      It rained all the next day.  There wasn't anyone in the courtyard sunbathing, most importantly she wasn't.  I spent most of the day with my ear to the floor just trying to hear her.  I spent hours in each room, just hoping for something.  I did hear the slight noise of what I think was a toilet flushing once, but I can only dream it was her.  Maybe as she was sitting there she was looking up at the ceiling, thinking of me. The image was wonderful. It was just a dream though.  That's all I have are dreams.  For now at least it will have to do.

      It's been two days now since I've seen or heard her and it's driving me crazy.  The sun's been out and there have been people out there sunbathing, but not Marie.  That's what I've named her. Marie. 

My Marie. 

Her car hasn't been in the lot either, maybe she took a trip.  She couldn't have moved, I would have noticed that.  What if I did miss it though?  What if somehow she packed up and left.  No!  I can't think thoughts like that.  It has to be a trip.  Or what if she's dead, got into an accident.  Lying on the side of the road with her car engulfed in flames.  The smell of her flesh burning.  Her screaming my name to help her. That thought put a smile on my face.  Me just standing there listening to her scream my name over and over until her last gasp.  With her dead, nobody else could have her.  She's my Marie.

      She's back, thank god.  I saw her yesterday.  I wanted to ask about her absence, to make sure everything was ok, but I knew that wouldn't be good.  It rarely is good anymore, except for the few occasions when I can see her.  She hasn't been out sunbathing recently, which is nice.  No sunbathing means no stranger's eyes raping her, wondering if her tits are real.  For as much joy I get from seeing her, knowing there's other eyes trying to do the same thing, trying to enjoy her the same way kills me. No, it's not the same way.  They don't know her like I do.

      We met in the elevator today. As soon as the doors opened and I saw her my heart dropped.  She still smells the same.  God, I wish I could just get closer to her, to smell her more. 

I spoke to her instead, "do you know that guys watch you when you sunbathe in the courtyard?" 

She said, "Yeah, that's why I do it. I know they get off by seeing me." 
I couldn't respond.  She's just like the others.

"It doesn't bother you at all?" 

"Why would it", she said. 

I have to be dreaming, this is some kind of nightmare.  No! There's no way she's saying this.  She's different, I swear.  This is my Marie. 

"I know you watch me and I know what else you do that goes beyond that.  I was gonna say something, but I enjoyed it."

I couldn't believe this; the time from one floor to the next was going in a different time then the words coming out of her mouth.  The doors finally opened.  "Did you fucking enjoy it weirdo?" she said as the door closed
      Yeah, I kind of did, I thought as I inhaled deeply. behind her.   

Damn!

Thanks Larry for all the comments, especially breaking down the parts you had problems with.  That's what I was looking for. 

I printed out your remarks, another copy of the story and I'm preparing to do some rewriting today.  That along with beer, rum, jagr and a few drugs thrown into the mix, but don't tell anyone. 

I agree. 

That and a outside opinion.

   “My life is a sham”, I said as I tore at her flesh.  She easily separated from the bone.
   They see me as a tender caring soul.
   They’re wrong.  I’m not.
   The taste of her melting in my mouth, causing the saliva to form, froth and fall.  Myself becoming one with her before she was inside of me.  I tore at the small body more, tearing strips of her with each pass.
   I needed to finish before they came home.  This part of my life needs to remain mine and mine alone.  They were so wrong about me.
   I found this one in the backyard a few houses down.  As I was walking down the street I could hear singing.
   It sounded beautiful.  I was mesmerized by it even before I saw her.  I slowly crept around the house into the enclosed backyard.  The gate was ajar, so it was easy for me to slip in unnoticed.  I finally laid my eyes on her for the first time.  She was wearing a colorful outfit that revealed things to my own eyes, hopping around, playing carefree by the swing set with her back towards me.
   She never saw me coming.
   She was still singing, but a different song as I overpowered her within a flash. I enjoy this song so much more.  I quickly went for the neck, pulling a small chunk from her as our connection severed.  Blood resulted from that action, which made me want her even more. I licked the blood off the ground and her.
The ground was cold, but she wasn’t.
She was so small, there wasn’t any struggle and within an instant she was gone.
   After chewing on the bit for a few minutes, I spit it to the side and took her to my own yard.  I passed my neighbor on the way back to the house.  I stopped as we made eye contact and dropped the project at my feet as I continued to stare at him.  His eyes went from me, to the project and back to me.  After a few seconds he turned and walked back into his house.  I laughed as I picked her up and continued to my house.
   To each their own I thought as I finally made it to the privacy of my own backyard.
   I played with the limp body for awhile before I took off her head. The action was simple with my mouth ripping through veins and muscle that connected the two portions.
   I love the sound of flesh ripping.  I placed my head where she once was, to enjoy more of her substance.
   So tender.
   I licked her neck trying to arise more blood from her, but it was pointless.  She gave all she could.
   I played with the head, passing it back and forth between my hands.  Watching her eyes spin over and over.  Unfortunately, I could only enjoy this briefly and had my sights set on her limp body.
   Her head laying there.
   Upside down.
   Her eyes watching me as I defiled her body. I saw a slight glimmer in those eyes. I wonder if she was enjoying it as much as I was.
   I know she was.
   I had to stop in mid thought and action when I heard the sound of the car door shutting.
   They were home
   I quickly placed the body behind the pine tree to dispose of it later. Batting her head over like a small ball that I had when I was younger.
   They weren’t around then. It was others.  They left me before I honed my skills and they didn’t find any of my projects.  If they did, they didn’t disturb it like these ones, but I moved on from them.
   They always leave me.
   Not the projects.
   They never leave, until now.
   Even in the beginning, they were dead beyond what I thought one could be.
   They moved.
   But never left.
   Unsatisfied, I walked around the house to meet them.
   The others.
   Them.
   The believers of my false life.
   My sham.
   As I met them at the front door, I said “Hello”, they said something back.  What it was I couldn’t say.  As I followed them into the house, we went our separate ways.  Them going upstairs and myself going into the kitchen to quench my thirst.  You don’t realize how thirsty projects make you. I finished my drink at the same time as they came downstairs and entered the kitchen.
   They didn’t even look at me.
   I watched as the one sat down at the table as the other one went to the fridge to pull out the leftovers from yesterday.
   I chuckled to myself, and here I thought my life was a sham.
   I ate a little with them, but really didn’t have much of an appetite because of my earlier encounter. I could still taste her.  I left them in the kitchen talking, but not really understanding what they were saying.  That’s how it always was. They speaking and the words just seem foreign to me.  I understand more as the days go by.
   I head upstairs and fall asleep in the guest bedroom.  By the time I wake up, the house was dark.  I went downstairs; I didn’t need the light to lead my way.  I am happy to be alone and have missed their mindless conversation for the day.  I went to living room window that overlooked the backyard.  With the moon full, I could see the pine tree, but couldn’t see what it hid within its branches.
   I guess that was the point.
   I wanted to go out there and properly dispose of her, but the thought of her eyes staring at the beautiful moon made me wait till morning.  I wanted her to enjoy it as much as I was.
   I ended up falling asleep on the couch.
   I awoke to their footsteps and the daily routine began again.  The noise of their feet hitting the steps and then walking past me.  Not saying a word.
   To me.
   To each other.
   They end up at the kitchen table and we just stare at each other.  The silence was wonderful, but I couldn’t wait for them to leave.  To let my real life come to the surface again.  It was getting harder and harder to suppress what I needed when they are around.  I believe they’re the cause of it, unless it’s been inside me the whole time.
   It doesn’t matter.  The result is the same.
   After what seemed like hours, they finally left with me right behind them.  I told them “Bye”, as they go into the car and they mumbled something back to me.  All I understood was ‘be good’.  The fresh air felt wonderful.  I knew I had to take care of yesterday’s project still in the backyard, but first I wanted and needed something to ease my mind.  I walked down the street with my ears and eyes alert for anything.
   A few projects passed my path, but nothing I could take advantage of.
   God hates me.
   Disappointed, I went back to the house to finish the work form yesterday.  As I made my way to the tree, I went between the branches and to my astonishment she was gone.
   No body.
   No head.
   No flesh.
   She was gone.  It was them.  It had to be. They moved her.  Erased her existence from mine.  How dare they do this without saying anything to me?  I began to worry.  Were they intruding on my other life?
   My true life.
   They had no right to do that.
 No right to touch her.
 To move her.
 No right to enter my other life.
   I left the yard pissed and needing to find something to unleash it on.
   I walked the street and found nothing.  I kept walking. 
Determined.
The farther I walked the more the need grew. It’s a feeling I hate. I despise.
It’s because of them.
   They had no right to touch her.
   Despite my anger, there wasn’t anyone out.
   It was as if I was alone on the planet.  I laughed briefly until it donned on me that being alone would mean a halt to the projects. 
A halt to my enjoyment.
A halt to my feelings.
 I couldn’t deal with that.  I couldn’t handle the pain of not finding anyone today, I can’t  imagine going through this daily.  I needed to share myself with others and not be selfish.  I wanted to spread my joy.
   My thoughts are interrupted as I make my way back to my house to see her there.  Singing, just like the other one.
   This couldn’t be.
   After all I’ve been through today, to have her appear on my doorstep.  The only thing that would  make this better if she was already in the backyard lying there, just waiting for me.
   Wanting me.
   I walked up behind her, I could already taste her, but as I went to pounce,she turned to look at me.  At the same time as our eyes met, my hand was on her neck.  With that touch the look in her eyes changed, her expression changed.  I wasn’t sure which look I enjoyed better.  The surprise or the realization of what was coming.  It didn’t matter; the end result was the important thing.  It was what I wanted.
   I had her by the neck and wanted her even more.
   I wanted her now.
   Myself sinking deeper into her flesh, trying to go through her.  That drew blood and squirming.
   I love the fight.
   My anger had to be let loose and she was going to be the goal of that action.  My hand met the side of her head.
   She went limp after that.
   I threw her to the side, waiting a few seconds, hoping she would move again.  She didn’t.  I wanted to play more.  I picked her up and carried her to the backyard.  Just like the others, how many, I have no idea, I took off her head.  It was becoming a routine.  I wish she was still alive.  I wish she would fight.
   Then I heard it.
   The dreaded sound of the car door shutting.  Damn them, I thought as I carried the pieces to the pine tree again.
   Why?
   I’m not sure. Since they involved themselves the last one, then what was stopping them from doing the same with this one?
   I took another swipe at her before I left, hoping for her to reveal more blood.
   Nothing.
   Once again disappointed, I went to meet them at the front of the house.  We exchanged the usual greetings, but I was waiting for them to say something about the last project.  They didn’t.   If they weren’t going to speak of her, then I wasn’t.
   I followed them inside and after a quick drink, I went upstairs to sleep.
   When I awoke, I was alone in the house.  They left without even waking me.  Did they already find her in the backyard and dispose of her like trash?  I raced down the stairs, but I already knew the answer. 
   When I reached the front door I found it locked.  I pawed at the knob hoping for some miracle of it opening, but it was pointless.  I went to the window only to find that they had locked them also.  I thought about smashing through, but after a few minutes I disregarded that thought.
   I couldn’t leave.
   I went to the kitchen to eat.  At least they left me some food and water, being the prisoner I was.  I finished with my stomach being satisfied, but my mind still restless.  Knowing it would only fuel the fire, I went to the living room window to look at the pine tree that hid but revealed so much.  I wasn’t sure if I hated or loved it that tree.
   Angered, at the tree for giving up my secrets and them for finding them, I went upstairs.  I went to my bathroom to releave myself, but in mid-action, a thought entered my mind and I halted the process.  I left the bathroom and walked down the hall to their bedroom.  As I entered the room, I saw the neatly made bed in front of me, the corners of the mattress forming a perfect right angle.  I quickly jumped on the bed to finish the action I had started only a few moments before.  It felt wonderful to see the dark circle grow larger and larger on the bed.  Once I was done I went downstairs to take a nap on the couch and wait for them to return.
   I awoke to the sound of a key turning in the lock. 
   That dreaded sound.
   That dreaded lock.
   Yawning, I watched them come in and without even noticing me, go straight upstairs.  I sat on the couch, still anxious to get outside to see her.  Within seconds I heard yelling and the stomping of feet coming down the stairs.  I heard them say my name “Henry”, but I could only make out a few other ones they were saying, “Cat”, “dead”, “birds”, “mice”, “piss”.  I walked over to them and said “Hello”, just waiting to get outside.